


Wicked Cuts

by madrabbitgirl



Series: Shampoo, Snip, Slither [1]
Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hairdresser, Alternate Universe - Human, Cosmetology AU, F/F, Female Aziraphale (Good Omens), Female Crowley (Good Omens), First Meetings, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Hair Stylist Aziraphale, Hair Stylist Crowley, Ineffable Wives, Mentioned Gabriel (Good Omens), No beta we fall like Crowley, Pre-Relationship, They're both hairstylists, ace friendly, hairstylist, meet cute
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-08
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-13 12:15:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,298
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29278311
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/madrabbitgirl/pseuds/madrabbitgirl
Summary: Crowley is a star hair stylist at Wicked Cutz. Her boss, Beez, decides to hire a new stylist and Crowley can’t fathom working with this girl! She wore white to interview at a salon! No one does hair in white! But when Beez asks Crowley to be Aziraphale’s model during the technical interview, she can’t help but relax under the Aziraphale’s divine hands.Or, I wanted to try my hand at a meet cute featuring Female Aziraphale and Female Crowley.
Relationships: Aziraphale & Crowley (Good Omens), Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Series: Shampoo, Snip, Slither [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2150151
Comments: 6
Kudos: 46





	Wicked Cuts

**Author's Note:**

> OK before you come for me for stuff, let me just say I AM a licensed cosmetologist in one tiny state in the US so I might not know everything and I'm mostly basing all of this off of my own knowledge from where I work. Also, all salons are different. 
> 
> Inspired by my absolute hatred of all-black dress codes. 
> 
> I might decide to make this a little series of fics (because now I want them to fall in love) but also it was a cute little one shot idea I had.

“You can’t do hair in that,” Crowley said, glaring at the girl who stood by the front desk. She looked lost and entirely out of place. For starters, in a salon where almost everyone was wearing black, she had on an almost white, perfectly tailored suit, complete with a shabby beige waistcoat. To top it all off, her white-blond curls were quite frizzy and she was barely wearing any make-up. “You sure she’s a stylist?” 

“Considering I just interviewed her, yes,” Beez said with a hard glare. “She comes highly recommended.” 

Crowley scoffed, tossing her perfect red hair over her shoulder. “By who?” 

“She’s one of Gabriel’s old employees.” 

Ew, Gabriel. That wanker. He was the biggest egomaniac in the business and the Kool-aid that people had to drink to work for him was definitely poisoned. Crowley should know. She was one of Gabriel’s rejects, too. 

She tutted, continuing her long-distance examination of the other girl. “Well, well. Fall from his good graces, has she?” 

“Could you not be the biggest bitch in the salon today? Ta,” Beez said. The entire shop, Wicked Cutz, was pretty much all staffed with rejects from Heavenly Hairlines. “She’s going to shampoo you.” 

“The fuck she is!” Crowley snapped angrily. She flopped back into the chair at her station, pulling her phone out of her bra. “She should’ve brought a model for a technical interview. I’m not letting any newbie near my head.” 

“You don’t have a choice. Her model cancelled. She’s going give you a blow out, get up,” Beez snarled. They kicked Crowley’s chair, sending her twirling. “You’ve been sitting on your arse half the day with your eyes glued to your phone. Get. Up.” 

Crowley groaned, but she complied with her boss’s request. Honestly, she didn’t have anything on her books until the evening, but she didn’t feel like being helpful. “Alright, but if she makes me look like a fucking posh-” 

“Save your threats. You’ll have time to fix it before your next client,” Beez said. They were an interesting boss. Not quite a friend, but also not quite an enemy, they identified as non-binary and they ran a very tight ship. Crowley both loved and hated them. She stomped after her boss, taking the opportunity to observe one of Gabriel’s latest rejects up close and personal. 

“This is Toni Crowley, one of our stylists,” Beez said, motioning to Crowley with a dismissive gesture. “You’re going to blow her.” 

The other girl looked flustered, and her softly round cheeks dusted with the sweetest pink (which Crowley observed by looking at her over the tops of her sunglasses, briefly). “Oh! I, ehm, well, that’s quite-” 

“Inappropriate?” Crowley purred, cocking her hip. She knew that she looked good today, but she _always_ looked good. She’d splurged on a pair of vintage leather trousers that she almost regretted wearing to work but she loved the impression it made on her clients, and she had on a deep red Westwood-inspired corset top. She topped it with a tight, roughed up leather jacket that she replaced with a black apron when she was working on her clients. “It’s just Crowley, by the way. You call me Toni and I'll-” 

“Yeah, yeah, no one cares,” Beez snapped. They motioned to the other girl. “This is Aziraphale. Well? Get to it!” 

They went back behind the front desk to do whatever it was they did during the day, leaving Crowley to show Aziraphale back to the shampoo bowls. The salon itself, for the sake of setting the scene, was painted a dark charcoal color with hardwood floors. The stations were a matching raw wood color with a circular mirror mounted behind them. Each stylist had a drawer on their station and a small cart next to it for their tools. It was calming, with chill music that had a slightly creepy edge filtered in from hidden speakers. There were more plants now that Crowley worked here. She loved greenery and made a point of bringing in some of her personal cuttings to sprinkle along the shelves, especially around the shampoo area. It made everything more relaxing. 

Crowley threw her lean body down into the chair in front of the shampoo bowl. They were the type of sinks that had a little ledge for people to stand directly behind them. It was Beez’s attempt at saving everyone from having a bad back, but in Crowley’s opinion nothing really helped. “Towels are in the cupboard there. Gimme the scalp treatment one. If Beez is making me do this I might as well get something good out of it.” 

“Oh, my dear, I hope I’m not inconveniencing you-” 

Unfffff, that soft voice did things to Crowley’s stomach that she _loved_ but also didn’t like. She shook her head, attempting a grin at the soft, sweet person that was about to massage her head. “Nah. ‘Course not, angel. I wasn’t doing anything else.” 

“Angel?” Those perfect blond brows lifted up, her full lips parting ever so slightly. Crowley’s wicked grin widened. 

“You’re from Heavenly. ‘Course you’re some kind of angel,” Crowley said with a smirk. She allowed Aziraphale to wrap a towel around her shoulders and neck and then she leaned back. What a weirdo this new stylist was. 

“Ah. Well, I hardly think that makes me an angel. Not to mention, I’ve left. Wouldn’t I be a fallen angel or a demon?” Aziraphale asked nervously. “I’m sorry, my dear, but would you remove your glasses? I just don’t want to accidentally spray them.” 

“No problem,” Crowley said, closing her eyes and then removing her glasses. Her eyes were a funny color yellow and she knew it bothered a lot of people to see them. “I don’t think you can just stop being an angel. You walk in here, dressed in all white, all pristine and shit. You’re still an angel no matter where you do hair.” 

She heard Aziraphale start the water. 

“Then are you also an angel?” 

Oh, this new girl’s soft voice was kind of nice to listen to. Crowley hummed. 

“Nah. Nah, I’m a demon, me. Don’t think I’d look great in all white.” 

“I dunno, I imagine a few occasions where you’d look very nice in all white.” 

“Ngk!” Crowley choked on her tongue right as the water glided over the top of her head. 

“Oh, I’m so sorry, my dear. I should have asked you if that was an alright temperature. Was it too hot?” Aziraphale paused, pulling the water away from Crowley. 

“No, no, s’fine. It’s um, great.” Crowley hadn’t really been paying attention to the water, anyway, but now as Aziraphale moved the hose back over her head she realized it _was_ actually a perfect temperature. She hummed appreciatively and relaxed under the gentle ministrations of this strange new girl. Once Crowley’s strands were fully soaked, the water shut off and she could hear the gentle pump of a shampoo bottle, followed by Aziraphale rubbing her hands together to lather the soap. Then, Aziraphale started to work the soap through Crowley’s hair.

Fuck. 

Her hands, which were on the larger side and very soft and plump, were surprisingly strong and firm. Her fingers pressed and rubbed at every point of tension on Crowley’s tight skin, soothing out tangles and knots as her straightened hair started to curl. 

“Oh, my dear, what a beautiful natural texture you have,” Aziraphale’s voice murmured. “These waves are quite stunning.” 

Crowley only answered her with a moan of appreciation. After a few more moments of silence, she finally managed, “Gabriel taught you right when it comes to shampoos, I’ll give ya that one.” 

Aziraphale snorted and began rinsing the tingling shampoo from Crowley’s scalp. “My mother owned her own shop and I spent many years working there while I was in school. Gabriel taught me nothing I didn’t already know.” 

Crowley cackled, squinting her eyes so they remained shut. “I’d love to see his face if you ever tell him that.”

“Oh, I’m dreadfully sorry, but it’s already been done,” Aziraphale told her. Another pumping sound meant that the slightly cold tea tree scalp treatment was being warmed between two angelic hands. “I told him as much when I handed in my resignation.” 

“I bet you even gave the full two weeks, didn’t’cha?” Crowley guessed, grinning delightedly. Aziraphale chuckled. 

“I _did_ , but as you can imagine he was rather put out over it and asked that I never return,” Aziraphale said with a sigh. “I do hope wherever I end up that my clients will be able to follow me. I’m not so very adept at the social medias that everyone seems to be on these days.”

“Well, unless you royally fuck up my hair, which is basically impossible since we’re only doing a blow-out service, I’m pretty sure you’ve got the job here. And I can help you with anything you need for marketing, angel. It’s one of the only reasons ol’ Beelzebub keeps me around,” Crowley said, just as Beez was walking past them to get to the back office. They snorted.

“One of? Try ‘the only’,” they instructed as they continued walking. 

“I’m sure that’s not true. You’re probably a very skilled technician,” Aziraphale soothed, rinsing the treatment from Crowley’s hair and patting it down with a towel. Crowley noticed that she didn’t fluff all over, thus roughing up Crowley’s cuticle layer, and that she made more of a wringing motion to get as much of the excess water out as possible. Not to mention those hands were an absolute _sin_. Efficient, soothing and firm in all the right places? Crowley was a puddle by the time Aziraphale was through with her. 

“Alright, show me to your station, dear,” Aziraphale instructed nervously. As confident as she was in her skills, which was apparent through the way she moved her hands, she seemed to be lacking some of that when it came to everything else. Crowley put a hand up to steady the towel on her head and slid her glasses back on her face. 

“S’right this way, angel,” Crowley said, standing on jelly legs to lead Aziraphale over. “Did you bring your own tools or d’you want to use mine?” 

“I actually didn’t expect to be given a technical interview at this time, so I left my own tools at home. I rather expected an in person and then a technical later,” Aziraphale murmured. Crowley nodded and sat down in her chair, pulling a cape from where it sat on her station. 

“Here, put this on me,” Crowley instructed. Aziraphale hurried to do so. “Not that you really need it for a blowout but it’ll look good when Beez comes back. We’re not as fancy as Heavenly, so we usually do the interviews altogether, but they’re really good at forgetting to tell people that. They want to see what you do when you’re out of your comfort zone. Straight as you can, some volume but not so much, and don’t even think about coming after me with shears.” 

“I promise, cutting your gorgeous hair had never even crossed my mind,” Aziraphale promised. She helped herself to a brush from Crowley’s cart and began to untangle any lingering knots in the dark red strands. “It’s your own, too, isn’t it? The color.” 

“Oh, yeah, grows out of my head this way.” 

“And the curls? Why do you hide them? They’re so beautiful,” Aziraphale said with a sweet smile, as if her own hair wasn’t also curly. 

“I dunno, just don’t feel professional enough with them showing. I like to look smooth, slick. Kind of scary,” Crowley said, watching Aziraphale work in the mirror. 

“Ah, well. You do look rather intimidating,” the other girl agreed. They fell silent as it was sort of hard to talk over the blow dryer, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. Crowley enjoyed watching Aziraphale and seeing both the influences of Gabriel as well as Aziraphale’s own knowledge. When she was done, Crowley’s hair was perfectly straight and luminous, and all without the touch of a straightening iron. It was, probably, one of the best blowouts she’d ever had. 

She tried not to let it show, even as her own fingers slipped through silken tresses. “Wow, angel. Not half bad.” 

Aziraphale looked flustered and shyly proud at the praise, but at the same time she knew she was good at her job. “I’m glad you like it. It’s easy when the canvas is perfect to begin with.” 

Crowley was _not_ blushing. “I’m pretty sure you’ve got the job, though.” 

“Yeah, looks alright and the two of you seem to get on okay,” Beez interrupted, coming over from the front desk. “I’d make you do a cut but I know where you come from. Couldn’t have been too bad if you worked over at Gabe’s. You want to start tomorrow?” 

Aziraphale’s eyes met Crowley’s in the mirror, and her plush lips curled into a small smile. Crowley grinned back, giving her an encouraging nod. “Yes. Tomorrow would be fine.” 

“Great. Come in at nine, we’ll get you started,” Beez said, their monotone voice conveying no actual emotion.

Crowley eased up out of her chair as gracefully as she could, but salon chairs were always awkward. She tugged the cape from around her shoulders and tossed it down, slipping the towels out from underneath. “What sort of coffee do you like for tomorrow? My treat.” 

“Oh, no, I couldn’t possibly-” 

“C’mon, angel. We’re going to be stuck together. Might as well make friends,” Crowley pressed, scratching at the back of her neck. Aziraphale nodded in agreement, and this time when she smiled she did look genuinely delighted. 

“A large mocha latte, then. If you’re insisting,” Aziraphale told her. Crowley grinned.

“You got it, angel.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! If you liked it, you may also like my angsty WIP 'Crawling Back to You' or my 4 AM Diner Universe 'Slice of Love'. 
> 
> Find me on [ Tumblr ](https://madrabbitsociety.tumblr.com)  
> or on my [ My Blog ](https://www.madrabbitsociety.com/p/insta-links.html)


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